Your fields will plenty reap
by wren3
Summary: Takes place after the last ATGB episode - an exciting, and challenging time for Jean and Lionel and their loved ones. Chapter 2 added!
1. Cecily

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Hi guys! Hope you enjoy this one, it was a rather..interesting idea I had. Don't hate me please *wink*

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Disclaimer: Standard, really: I'm only borrowing"**As Time Goes By**" **and its characters.**

The day was sunny and warm, not too hot, for the height of summer was past for this 

year, as Lionel walked along the street to his home, his arms laden with library books and 

shopping. Juggling his load he managed to unlock the door. He entered into the stillness, 

and acknowledged that though he didn't miss the girls as much as Jean did, the house seemed far more empty and silent since Judy had married Alistair and Harry had literally whisked Sandy away to Canada. Still, it would only be a few months most likely, before Sandy and Harry would back in London, and Judy and Alistair did visit frequently. In fact, they were coming for supper that night, which was why Lionel had been given the grocery list as Jean headed out, rushed, to work at the charity shop earlier. He put his bags down on the kitchen table and checked his watch. His wife would be home in a few hours. He then ran his library books upstairs, put away the food, and fixed himself a light lunch. He was just finished tidying up the dishes when the doorbell rang. 

The caller was a young woman. 

"Yes?" he said politely. 

She didn't respond, in fact she seemed frozen to the spot. He regarded her, found 

himself studying her, as if drawn in. Her hair was long, past her shoulders, and ash 

blond, thick and curly. She wore jeans, a purple t-shirt with a design in black on the 

front, no makeup, a bit of jewellery – he noticed a silver charm bracelet, and dangling 

beaded earrings, topped on one side by small studs, also of silver, all the way up her left 

ear. Someone average looking enough, to his eyes, but with a bit of flare too, or so one 

of the women in his life might have judged. She was young, perhaps no more than 20. He wondered why she was here, and slightly irritated, that she had neither identified herself nor stated her purpose. At the same time, he saw that her tall thin frame trembled, the distress written in the angular features, her pallor, that made the smattering of freckles across her cheeks and nose stand out. 

So his tone was gentle as he asked

"Can I help you?" 

She met his gaze with green eyes that all of a sudden seemed to strike him, to resonate a deep familiarity. 

"Hi. Y-yes. M-my name is Cecily Evans. I'm looking for Lionel Hardcastle."

"I'm he." His whole being tingled, but he could see she was stressed, and was about to suggest she come in and sit down, and offer her a cup of tea, but before he could do that, she rushed ahead. 

"I'm here for school, that starts in a few weeks... so I thought in the meantime that I would.. my parents, I was afraid of hurting them, but they understand and support me on this." She paused, and drew in a ragged breath. Lionel was thoroughly confused. 

"I'm adopted, you see. Which.. well it doesn't mean that my Mum and Dad are somehow are any less my parents. It's just...it means I need to see where I come from." 

Lionel's stomach began to roil.

"When I turned 18 this year, I got to see the records, and we managed to trace my birth mother. I met her just a few days ago. And I asked her.. because there was a blank space on the birth certificate, I asked her, and she did tell me." 

The world suddenly began to spin around Lionel as he was hit by the meaning of the words. 

Her eyes filling, she nodded in affirmation.

"Yeah. I'm your daughter." 


	2. strangely mingling joy and pain

Thanks Meira! :D Hope you enjoy this next chapter! 

Later, Lionel was peeling potatoes. The kids were due any minute. His mind was firmly elsewhere. He tried not to think of her, how she looked just hours earlier, sitting at the very kitchen table behind him now as he worked. How she held the mug. Her voice. Every word of what was said. 

She'd shown him the folder that contained the documents that proved..

But he didn't need them. Whatever else had passed between them, he had no reason not to trust the girl's biological mother's word. Cecily's birthdate was right. About nine months after.. and eight months or so after she'd left the plantation.

"You'll have to forgive me" he'd begun, sticking his shaky hands in his pocket. 

"I've come as a bit of a shock.." she said.

"Margaret never said. We've only seen each other once since..and she never breathed a word." 

"How did-" 

"Do you know, you have my mother's eyes. Mine, I suppose too.." 

She smiled widely at that. 

"I guess you're right."

"And there's something of her in you as well." 

Cecily's expression changed to one of hurt then. He could tell from that – the meeting had not gone well. She realized.

" No, I didn't mean, there were no dramatics, no hysterics, or anything. It's – it's just I think she separated us a long time ago. I'm not sure I'll ever have a place in her life." 

Her gaze wondered the same thing about him. 

And then because he didn't know what else to say, he said brokenly

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." 

The gentle touch on his arm.

"There's no need to apologise." 

They'd lingered a bit after that. Cecily had shown him her sketch book, which she'd pulled out of her shoulder bag to find a piece of paper to write down her address and phone number for him. And he was amazed at the skill and emotion he saw there. 

"Nearly all my life, drawing, painting, has been part of me. I almost couldn't imagine doing anything else in life. That's what I'm studying now, art ." 

She told him she'd been raised in New Zealand, he'd thought that was where her accent was from/

"I remember Margaret said her sister lives in Auckland. Maybe she went there when she.." 

Cecily continued for him.

"Well, that's where my parents lived, and where I was born, so you must be right. My mum, she wasn't able to safely carry a baby to term because of health problems, so they adopted me. My dad's just retired, and they decided to come here to the UK, they live in Essex now, right by the sea. My brother-he's about five years older than me, a foster child, that's how he came to our family, when I was three. He lives in Queenstown. Does the whole adventure tour guide thing. Always been the outdoors, risktaking type of person, I guess. I don't really get it." she shuddered jokingly. 

"Still, we're quite close, always have been." She talked more about her family life. He began to ache more and more as she went on, but his thirst for this painful knowledge only grew.

Then, she'd taken a sip of the tea and then looked up towards him again.

"But I've talked enough. What about you?" 

So he'd told her, funny how he didn't feel uncomfortable at all, telling a perfect stranger about Jean, about the army, Kenya, all of it. 

Then, reluctantly, he was surprised to find, Cecily told him she needed to leave, to return home. 

"I'll have to read your book sometime." 

"Well, if you ever suffer insomnia, it's recommended for that, at least." 

She'd laughed

"Oh I'm sure it's not as bad as that." 

She'd shouldered her knapsack, and said 

"Goodbye. Talk to you soon?" As if not trusting that he would want to.

He wanted to ask her, a part of him did, to stay to dinner, to meet Jean, her daughter and son-in-law.

Another part, the wiser part, knew that it was best to take things slowly.

He'd folded the piece of paper on which she'd written her address and phone number-he'd had the presence of mind to ask her- and put it carefully in his pocket, and tried his best to go on with his day. 

"Hello Mum, Lionel" he now heard from the front door.

"Hello Judy love." 

He came out of the kitchen to a hug from his stepdaughter. 

"How have you been, Lionel?" 

"Quite well, thank you. And you?" 

She smiled her dimpled smile

"Fine." 

"Where's Alistair?" 

"Just parking. He should be in in a minute." 

And he was. As usual the vivid presence that almost made Lionel forget that nothing was usual on this day..

"Mom and Pop-in-law!" Alistair greeted them heartily, arms outstretched. 

Lionel glared, the same way he did at just about everyone of Alistair's greetings.

"Alistair" he replied. 

"Sorry, Li." The younger man grinned. 

"Come in, come in." Jean said, "I'll get you something to drink. dinner shouldn't be too much longer." 

It was over the pudding that they made their announcement.

"We-we thought it would be best to let you know here, now, and promise you I just found out this very afternoon" 

Judy took a deep breath, her eyes shining

"Oh Judy.." her mother breathed. 

"I'm so thrilled. Beyond words. Lionel isn't this wonderful?" 

"Absolutely. Congratulations you two." He meant it, with all his heart. In spite of Fate that seemed somewhere to be cackling at him. 

After they'd finished, they toasted the new baby. He and Alistair then decided to fall back onto their old habit of a strategic retreat to the pub. Judy and Jean didn't mind, they were chattering away, making plans. Also, Alistair did need it. This was like his wedding, only more intense, more reason to worry, more of everything that Alistair had a tendency to fear – commitment, responsibility. But then, he wasn't one of those men who was unable to handle it. He'd be OK, eventually. Lionel nursed his half as Alistair tried to come to terms with his feelings – frightening and joyful. And wondered what the publisher would say to know that they were almost at least, in the same boat. Except in his, Lionel's, case, there was pain and regret, guilt, and terrible uncertainty added into the bargain.

When they'd called it a night, Lionel had walked home, pulled on his pyjamas, did his nighttime ablutions, and dropped off in short order, as he usually did. The trick was to stay that way. His dreams were defined by the mess of emotions, and he kept waking up, sweaty , his heart pounding, the dream itself gone, but the feelings it had attached lingered. 

It wasn't long before Jean nudged him awake.

"Lionel, you're talking in your sleep again." 

"Oh, sorry. Thanks for waking me." 

She smiled, and turned over to get comfortable again. He knew he had to tell her. Now.

"Jean, can we talk? It's important."


	3. Take my hand

Jean lay back against her pillows, at a loss for words. Her stomach had felt funny, with the grave way Lionel had said we need to talk, but what followed, well, never in a million years would she have guessed... Her mind whirled, and the memory of her meeting with Lionel's ex-wife, disconnected voices that now seemed to make a clear picture.

_You were the girl in it. Yes, I was the girl in it. She still is. Always was, I suppose_

_I wanted to show you that I didn't remain the dull, boring wife you always thought I was_

"Jean?" 

His voice was shaking. Never had he seemed so fragile, so tremulous. 

"I'm just surprised, Lionel. Trying to gather my thoughts." 

Jean looked over at her husband. She knew him well enough to see what was troubling him.

"You feel guilty." She made it a statement, not a question. 

"Should I be anything else? I should have realised, that month before. There was enough.. I should have done something" 

There it was, she thought. So like Lionel, really. That sense of responsibility that she and the girls so often teased was quaint and old fashioned. She tried to think of how to answer, and in a moment, she said,

"Lionel, listen to me. Would you and Margaret ever fit together, or been happy together, baby or no?" 

He eventually admitted

"No." 

"And did your child find a good family?"

"She did." 

"And so I'd say that everything worked out all right. There's no reason to fret about what's in the past, and what can't be changed, anyway." 

"You're right. And here I thought you'd be angry at me. Or hurt."

"Lionel, you have done nothing that could make me angry, or to hurt me. I'm glad you told me. Do you know, it'll be nice.. and even a little exciting to get to know her, to get to know Cecily."

She paused and smiled mischievously. 

"Are you ready for one more recruit to join the monstrous regiment of women in your life, Second Lieutenant Hardcastle?" 

He did give a tiny smile at that. 

"I suppose I will be, in time." 

"Well that will have to do." 

She met his eyes, saw there was one more thing he needed.

"Come here." she whispered, and took her husband in her arms. 

**********

"Hello Mum?" 

"In the kitchen." 

Judy found her in the middle of a kitchen looked, to use Lionel's expression, like a hurricane had hit it, flitting around like a manic hummingbird. 

"Oh Judy, it's a shambles! I've run out of vinegar to make the salad dressing with only I didn't realise, when I was shopping. And I'm sure I should have gone with my first plan.. I know she won't like what I've made."

"Mum. It's all right. I'll call Alistair, and get him to pick some up on the way here. Your cooking will be more than fine, as it always is."

Judy was regarding her with part concern, and part amusement, which Jean understood, she had to admit. After all, she'd manage to take charge when Lionel had needed her to -which was sort of odd, Lionel was the one person in their family who was never the subject of the latest crisis or main event. She had been the one to explain about the arrival of his biological daughter to every one who needed to know; Sandy, Rocky and Madge, and Judy and Alistair. And had arranged for Cecily to meet everyone, in good time. She'd even encouraged Lionel to get in touch with his ex-wife and air a twenty year old secret.

And to get through that, then fall all to pieces by the act of preparing a simple lunch, well I suppose that's me, Jean thought ruefully. With a little laugh, she t drew Judy close, feeling calmer, and also for a moment, anchored again, appreciating the warmth of the connection that encircled them both and, Jean liked to think, the life beginning to grow within her daughter as well

"Thanks, love. I'm grateful. You know, I suppose it's not about the food anyway, it's just hit me. How awfully hard this will be for her."

"Yeah, I see what you mean. Well, we'll just have to make sure she feels welcome, right? 

"Right." 

"Now, I'll ring Alistair. And then I'll help you clean up this mess." 

Judy's eyes shone mischievously. Jean returned it with her patented glare, and Judy ducked out of the way just in time to avoid the dishcloth that went sailing her way. 

Alistair soon arrived, with the vinegar, as well as a bag of groceries, things that Jean would not have thought of - after all this was Alistair. 

The salad and its dressing were soon made. The kitchen and the rest of the house, for that matter, were sparkling, and Jean Judy and Alistair were free to sit down in the living room. It was just coming up to twelve thirty. 

"How's my main man?" was the first thing Alistair wanted to know. 

"He seems all right . He was out of bed. at..I don't when this morning. He said he was going for a walk after I got up, and he hasn't been back yet. I'm sure he will be before long."

Just then, they heard the door. He came through and Jean was glad when he greeted everyone as his usual self. He gave her a kiss, and said

"I'm sorry I was late. I guess I needed to have a think. I lost track of time."

"That's all right. Just go and get ready, she'll be here any minute."

He hurried up to his room to make himself more presentable. The doorbell rang before he was through. The shrill tone of it jangled Jean's taut nerves. 

"Now, you two will remember that we're trying to put her at ease, won't you? Don't try so hard that you make her uncomfortable. Especially not you, Alistair." 

He had the grace to look innocent. Judy just rolled her eyes.

"Yes, Mum." She said impatiently. "And now I think someone had better open the door." 

She took a breath and did so. It was her. 

"Hi. You must be Jean." 

The girl's smile was sincerely friendly, if nervous, and Jean returned it.

"That's right. Come in, come in. Would you like a drink?"

"Thanks, a glass of water would be nice. It's already hot out there." 

From that moment on, Jean felt as if this just might work. By the time she was serving the pudding everyone was relaxed, conversation was flowing well. Judy and Cecily were talking and she finally felt like she could really breathe a sigh of relief. They passed around the basket of fruit and the plate of baking. Cecily and Lionel bumped hands when the plate came to them, because they were both reaching for the custard tart that she'd gotten out for Lionel. 

" Guess we've just found something in common, eh? Dessert preferences." 

Lionel deadpanned. 

"Yes, I'm afraid it's genetic. Just like knobbly knees." 

Everyone laughed at that. Jean was glad to see Lionel's sense of humour show itself. 

"Sorry about that, you can have it," Cecily said when she'd recovered herself.

"Are you sure? I really don't mind. There are more in the kitchen." Lionel offered.

Jean had to bite her lip to stifle another giggle at that. Lionel and his custard tarts. 

"That's all right. Thanks."Cecily chose something else instead. 

Just as they were about to start, the doorbell rang.

"Who could that be, I wonder?" 

"I have no idea."

"I'll go," offered Alistair. 

In a moment The shrill, all too familiar voice carried through to the dining room.

"Haven't seen you in an age, young man. I do hope you're looking after our Judith?" 

"Oh no" Jean moaned, certain now that the day was ruined

Lionel, across the table looked quite white. 

"What are they doing here?" he hissed. 

Judy leaned over to Cecily, Jean could hear her whisper to the younger woman. 

" My aunt-my father's sister-and her husband. Brace yourself. I love them dearly, but they are..well.. quite overwhelming."

Jean stood as Penny and Stephen came in/ 

"Hello, you two." 

Penny kissed Jean on both cheeks. 

"Poor Jean, you look rather exhausted." 

"I'm fine, Penny." she replied. "How are you both?"

"Quite well."

There was a flurry of greetings between everyone. Penny soon swooped in on Cecily.

"I don't know you." 

"I'm Cecily. A friend of the family." 

"Well, lovely to meet you, Cecily."

"Likewise." 

Jean noticed with admiration that Cecily did not retreat, as if wishing that she could sink into the ground or fade into the wall. She hoped Penny would leave it at that, but knew it was probably a fool's hope. 

"What brings you to Holland Park?" Lionel asked, pointedly, and Jean shot him a warning glare. 

"I had a doctor's appointment, here in the city, so we thought it would jolly to surprise you.."

"How nice," Jean said faintly, remembering that Penny's gastroentrologist was in London, and thus praying that there would be no details offered.

"Well, we were just going to have our pudding. Would you like to join us? We have coffee or tea, as well."

"Good-o" Stephen said approvingly. 

Penny was sipping from her mug in the living room when she pursued the unanswered questions.

"So how do you know the family, Cecily? You're too young to be a friend of Judy's.. or at least, I assume so.. Do you work for their agency?" 

"No, I.."

Cecily shot a brief glance over to Jean that said "Help!"

"She's here because I invited her." Lionel said, to Jean's surprise. 

"And, since I know you'll ask, because, nineteen years ago, it just so happened that I was the one who fathered her." 

***********

"Bye, now! Have a safe drive." 

Jean watched Penny and Stephen drive off, then came in to the living room, where Lionel and Cecily were sitting and collapsed. It had definitely been a long few hours. 

"I'm sorry Cecily, that must have been awful."

"It's all right. Penny's face was quite priceless." 

"That it was." 

She turned toward Lionel, serious now.

"And I'm glad you said what you did." 

"I only told the truth."

"I know, but it meant a lot." 

There was a few minutes of comfortable silence before Cecily said that she needed to make a move. 

"Thanks for everything." 

"You're very welcome. Come and see us anytime."

"I will. Bye for now. Take care." 

"You too." 

They watched her drive off from their porch, the late afternoon sun warm on their shoulders.

Jean leaned into Lionel, and he put his arm around her. They stood there a good few minutes after Cecily's car was out of sight, awash in the contentment of being together, and grateful that the day had gone much better than they had anticipated. 


End file.
